Share this blog if you are addicted to social media sharing and want to spread knowledge.
Every day, millions of people are becoming hooked on sharing various things through social media. Internet Friends Using Computers Kompulsively (known as Internet FUCKing, sometimes I-FUCK) is an affliction growing every day and also includes use of various devices such as cell phone, tablets, anything that promotes social media, even that James Bond type watch Samsung advertises. Internet FUCKing has led to:
– children no longer knowing what, “go outside and play,” means.
– adults forgetting how to operate machinery properly such as vehicles while driving.
– politicians sharing pictures that can scar you for life if you see them.
– people forgetting what planet they live on.
– Autocorrect making asses of everyone.
– wrecked relationships and the growth of the Internet Divorce Lawyer industry.
– overinflated definition of one’s worth and toughness through Internet fighting and bullying.
and a host of other symptoms still being collected by our valiant researchers with assistance of all users through publicly accessible sharing sites.
There currently are three popular theories regarding the growth of Internet FUCKing:
- The first one blaming the growth of computers and social media sites, this theory has yet to be named;
- The second is that some humans are just flat out stupid, the longtime popular Stupid People Won’t Die theory;
- The third is based on the sheer joy, euphoria and pleasure people get simply from the notion they might get ‘laid’ tonight through the social Internet even if no physical contact happens, known currently as the I Am Forever Young theory among other names.
Our scientists speculate there might be some positives to Internet FUCKing. So far other than the occasional conversation between people who have lost touch through life changing events or meeting those with shared interests, not many have been discovered though the study is ongoing.
If you would like to join in the study more actively, either through contribution or by becoming a brave researcher, the first can be done by posting whatever you want all over the Internet no matter how asinine it is, the second through collected data gathering and writing of research papers/articles regarding your findings. Always make sure to include tags relevant to the subject such as I-FUCK and Internet Fucking for times when such data is gathered to be pooled into the larger study.
This message has been sponsored by the scientific foundation Humor in Everyone’s Life is Lacking (HELL).